Two great friends met me in the parking lot to see me off at 7:15 (they were running the 10K that started a little later). I was surprisingly calm, not even nervous enough to pee. I made my way toward the back of the pack - walked right past the 6 mile runners, the 9 mile runners, even the 13 mile runners. It was important that I have no illusions and stay out of peoples' way. So after they fired the gun 3 or 4 minutes passed before we even started moving. I stayed with the slow joggers for the first couple of city blocks, where all the crowds were. And then I stopped running and started walking. It was a shameful moment. I hadn't even run a whole 2 minutes. I'm sure no one was surprised but me, which is probably why I was so ashamed. I was really hoping that adrenaline would compensate for my lack of dedication to a training program. At that point, the runners were in front of me and the walkers were behind me and Tiffany's I Think We're Alone Now came on. I love that little music box. She talks about running just as fast as we can, so I figured I really should get moving - an eighties icon was demanding it of me.
I jogged very slowly for a while and in what seemed like no time at all I passed a sign that said 1 Mile. I couldn't believe it - I was a third of the way in! Then about 16 minutes and a few Britney Spears songs later I saw another sign that said 1 Mile - 5K. So the other sign was for one of the other races. Fuck you, first sign. I could have cried. There were actually a lot of points throughout the race and during the rest of the day where I had an overwhelming urge to cry. Maybe that's all the adrenaline did for me. What a gift. And my little music box was on shuffle, so the Mindy McCready songs that popped up made me think the universe was telling me it was okay to pull over to the side and cry for a while. Once I skipped over one of her songs and Mary J. Blige's Not Gonna Cry came on. Funny. There was a hydration stop after the real mile 1 marker. I took some gatorade, then vomited after I rounded the next curve. I've always wanted to vomit while working out because I thought it would make me feel like a real athlete. It didn't. Somewhere in the middle of mile 2 a man with a prosthetic leg rode by me on a bike with a little dog in the front basket. I really thought I was hallucinating.
I walked most of mile 2, which was a little disappointing. Eventually, I just became way too forgiving of myself. Someday I'll figure out that self-discipline thing. The finish line of the race was in Notre Dame's football stadium, so the running out through the tunnel part was neat. It was like I was Rudy and Fortune was saying to me: You're 5 foot nothin', 100 and nothin', and you have barely a speck of athletic ability. And you hung in there with the best college football players in the land for 2 years. And you're gonna walk outta here with a degree from the University of Notre Dame. In this life, you don't have to prove nothin' to nobody but yourself. And after what you've gone through, if you haven't done that by now, it ain't gonna never happen. Now go on back. I'm not exactly 100 pounds, but I am exactly 5 feet, so I've got that going for me. Plus the degree, but that thing has yet to prove its value.
The first time I hiked the Grand Canyon I had two thoughts when I got to the top: 1) I see people with ice cream cones, where's mine? and 2) I could do that again. Right now. When I crossed the finish line at the Sunburst I had two very similar thoughts: 1) I see people with popsicles, where's mine? and 2) I could do that again. Right now. But it was a little different than the euphoria of hiking 6 miles on a steep incline along canyon walls. I wanted to do it again because I knew I could have finished in a lot less time and wanted to prove it to myself. So my goal for my next 5K is to shave 10 minutes off my time, which shouldn't be all that difficult considering my official time was 52:42. They posted the professional photos of our finishes online today. I'm purple and flabby in them. I love them. There's even a 29 second video of me jiggling across the finish line. It makes me smile. I'm considering posting some of them on here, but I know that not all of you know who I am or what I look like and I'm not sure I want that to change. I almost forgot to tell you about my favorite music moment. The Rough Riders Anthem (you know, Stop, Drop, Roll) came on as I entered the stadium. It was awesome to have DMX tell me that this is how Rough Riders roll as I collapsed and remind me that Talk is cheap m............
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